It is all in the ‘replies’
1. Consistency in tone, rhythm and words.
Finding the linguistic norm of a person!
- When the truth is told – it is easy to reply.
- Remember, lying or hiding something is a complicated sequence of thought, memory and language construction.
Listen to the replies to questions that have been asked in a non intrusive manner to establish a baseline.
2. Defensive – Over Compensating is a good indicator for concern.
- ”You never believe what I say!”
- ” Why do you not believe me? ”
3. Deflecting off the subject is dissociating from the situation.
- Changing Subject : When the answers turn quickly into questions ”
- so – ”How are you doing?”
- and a particular favorite is when focus is paid to another problem that you are having for example… ” how is your child working through the drug problem or are you still suffering from some sickness ”
- Or ‘Dissociating’ words : Using words for example, The ”That” – that woman, that man, that car and not using ownership words such as the ‘ My’ car – ’My’ pen.
4. Slip of the tongue – Speaking out of turn
A word out of place. A word that just slips out… ‘Out of context words’. Remember those words and ask them why they used that word in particular.
5. Pay attention to the tenses
”I am not sleeping with that woman.” [Perhaps not today.. but yesterday?]
6. Honestly speaking
Words such as; honestly or truthfully speaking.
- This already means that the person has been dishonest before or they are about to attack you instead of answering you.
- Same is said when persons say ” I do not want to hurt you” expect the next word coming is a ”but”…..[expect a hurtful comment which could be true]
7. ”I hear what you say – but why should I believe you?”
- If you hear – ” I have said what I had to say and I am not discussing this anymore”
- If you hear – ”What do I have to gain by lying to you?”, and then you hear a big story ”justifying” answer, then more than likely there is a hidden agenda and the real reason is not being disclosed !
- If they attack and over compensate or simply walk away –
- or ” And that is all I have to say on the subject” – then be aware as the person is more than likely hiding something.
8. Distancing Words
A statement was put to someone, for example. ”You had your car stolen ” or ” You slept with that woman ”
- ”I did not have that car stolen ”
- ”I did not sleep with that woman”
They do not use ownership words or words of taking responsibility, such as; My, Our or associate with any ” personal ownership” affirmative word.
9.Repeating the same question again. [frequently used to buy time to consider either a selection of specific words or a story.]
Asking someone a question such as ” did you steal my chocolate?” and the reply is ” Did I steal your chocolate ” and They reply ” Did I steal your chocolate !”
There are times when some is repeating the same question back again. then consider using specific words does not mean that a person is hiding something or lying.
But when they answer back to you word-for-word ” NO I did not steal your chocolate ”. This repeating back using the same word and tense is demonstrating the lie and deception.
This technique may be used simply to ensure that you understand the reply more clearly.
If a simple ”No or Yes” reply was said and no change in tone, then one can deduce that the truth is being told.
10. Person is non responsive.
- When the person is unable to respond, then it indicates they are afraid of the implications of replying with the truth or they may be hiding something.
11. Phrase, Tone and Pitch
When the person replies and the pitch gets higher with certain words – or just a specific part of a story, consider that the reaction is giving clues to the ’why’.(The reason for the lie or why the person is hiding something).
In the ‘phrase or word’ pitch and tone, you can find direction by the ”sensitive clues ” in the story to find the why!.
Conclusion
The point is asking yourself and listening to your instinct and saying..” What is wrong with this word-picture”